Falco, the Mozart of music

My fellow rockonauts, I crave your pardon for the neglect to the blog lately. As you well know, there is no work in which mankind is presently engaged that is more important than that which we do here. That being said.....it's once more in to the breach dear friends!

The black arts. Some say they're evil, and shouldn't be tampered with. For those of you uninitiated to the embrace of the dark mother it includes such things as staying out way past dark, running into cemeteries and touching tombstones, playing mortal kombat, and seances.....yes, seances. The practice of gathering spiritually attuned individuals in an effort to commune with the dead, a seance absolutely requires that only true believers undertake this most blessed of dark events. So, when I logged into the online seance room on AOL, I asked anyone who doesn't totally believe to please leave. The leader of the seance
(Whosurdaddy _69) called for us to dim the lights in our respective rooms and light the candles we were instructed to bring in the mass mail we all received. I didn't have any candles so I broke one of the pieces of my headboard off and dipped it in lighter fluid. The room was momentarily filled with a fireball of light and a strong smell of burning petroleum based products. As the blaze dwindled to a small flame I read on. The seance had begun...the leader was typing various incantations, and as I tried to recite them on my own I could feel something almost dis-perceptible change in the air. I was seeing my room through different eyes. The collection of heavy metal eight track cassettes, the denim jacket, my collection of candles, I saw all of these as if for the first time. Yet they seemed vaguely familiar. The leader of the seance said that some of us may be experiencing paranormal activity by this point, and maybe even be channeling spirits ourselves. I asked the question aloud "is someone there"?. "FALCO!!!!" boomed a reply. The response had come from my own lips, yet in a voice that was clearly not my own. "The luck dragon from The Neverending Story"?? "No jackass that's Falcor!! I'm the departed soul of 80's rock Icon Falco" the spirit raged. "Ohhhh...You mean the Rock me Amadeus dude" I asked. As if beyond my control, my own hand reached up and slapped me hard. "I mean the Austrian music sensation who created MANY musical masterpieces that included Rock me Amadeus fool" I said to myself as I poked myself in the eye. "But you died in 1998, I remember cause the newspaper they let me read in juvey said so". I bit myself on the hand. "You must immortalize me on your righteously kick ass blog". I ripped a chunk of my hair out. "I'll do it...I'll do it, just stop making me hurt myself"!! "Uh....I'm dead genius, I can't make you do anything".

So anyhoo, although the mystery of why I continued to beat on myself for the next 20 minutes remains unsolved I do think we should raise a special "herb brownie" to our Austrian homey Johann (Hans) Hölzel, who went on to be come Falco. Not just because I have a fear that he could return and haunt me till the day I die, but because he really did know how to rock the house! Oh, and one last thing....when I sat back down to write this post a few minutes later, the modem wasn't even plugged IN!